Most parents need some type of childcare for their children, whether it’s because they are working, running errands or finally having a date night with their spouse. As parents of kids with autism and ADHD, we not only need care for them in those situations but also because we need a respite from the overwhelm. Yet, it’s not easy to find the type of care needed for a child on the spectrum. So how can you find someone you can trust? Use these six tips for finding childcare for your child with autism and ADHD.
Our childcare experiences
Our son J is now a teenager and is high functioning, so we haven’t had to find a babysitter or childcare provider for a while. However, when he was younger, I felt like it was a struggle to find the care he and his brother needed.
When he was a baby, we had a wonderful lady nearby who watched him while we worked at our jobs during the day. She came to us highly recommended and only watched babies for their first year. She took care of him all week and also one other baby for a couple of the days. It was an ideal situation, and I was sad when he turned one year old because we had to move him to another childcare provider.
We then enrolled him in a daycare center near our home after visiting and interviewing several of them. For the first couple of years, he had a fabulous teacher there who adored him. He was able to stay in her class until he was almost three. He then graduated from her class but had difficulty adapting to other teachers and classrooms. It was around this time that we really started asking our pediatrician and others about his behavior.
When J was about three and a half years old, my husband started staying home with him and his brother. We needed to find some intermittent care to give my husband a break and allow him to work on his music. Therefore, I enrolled them in a local Parents Day Out program for several hours twice a week that summer. Once the school year started, he began preschool at our church, and our youngest still attended the Parents Day Out program.
We also needed to find babysitters for date nights. Luckily, there was a teenage boy at our church whose mom had run an in-home daycare. He was used to being around and caring for kids. Our boys adored him, and he was able to do babysitting for us all during his high school years. After he left for college, it was a bit harder for us to find a babysitter for our kids.
When J was in fifth or sixth grade, he was finally eligible for our state’s Medicaid autism waiver. Through it, we tried patient assistance and care (PAC) for respite care. We dropped it though, because we weren’t happy with the provider. We could have pursued another provider, but we didn’t feel like it was worth it at the time with so many other things going on in our lives.
So what considerations do you need to take into account when finding childcare for your child with autism and ADHD?
1. Determine what type of childcare you need
It’s a different process to find childcare for your child if you need it while you are working versus if you need some care here and there for running errands, going to appointments, date nights, etc.
If you need care sometimes, then a babysitter or even a family member or friend may work best. However, if you need more care while you are working a 9-to-5 or shift job or care from someone who is trained to work with kids on the spectrum, then that requires a different level of expertise.
2. Reach out to your network of friends and family
When it comes to care for your child, you need to find someone you can trust. Your friends and family may know potential daycare centers, in-home daycare, nannies, babysitters or other care providers who they have experience with already and trust. Reach out to them and ask for recommendations first.
We found our daycare center because I asked the director of the Montessori preschool at our church for her recommendation. She knew a great one in our area. I ended up choosing it.
3. Contact local community services for advice
Do you have a local autism support group or patient advocacy organization in your area? Give them a call and ask for recommendations for care providers in your area. They are a great resource for information about autism and related services locally. The Autism Society of America has local affiliates throughout the United States, and they advise on many types of providers.
You also could check with your local chapter of Easterseals or The Arc for recommendations as well. If you are looking for respite care to give you a break from the overwhelm, do a search on the ARCH National Respite Network.
4. Consider PAC services through the autism waiver
Does your child have a Medicare autism waiver? You may be able to obtain care and respite through Patient Assistance and Care (PAC) services. One note on this (as I found out): if you have other children, the provider will only care for your child with autism. They will not watch your other children or take them out on outings, etc. We had looked into PAC as a potential after school care option, but we did not go that route because we would have had to find a second babysitter for our younger son. If your child with autism is your only child or youngest child (and you don’t need childcare for your older child or children), this could still be an option for you.
5. Interview potential care providers
It is so important that once you have a short list of childcare candidates to meet with them in person and interview them. If you are considering a daycare facility or in-home daycare, ask for a tour. If you are interviewing potential babysitters, have them meet and interact with your child for a little while. You can often tell if it could be a good match by the way your child responds to the person.
If you are looking at a daycare facility, follow this checklist to ask detailed questions about a daycare or in-home facility, staff, safety, nutrition, curriculum, policies and more. The daycare center should be properly licensed through your state. Also, check to see if it accredited.
6. Listen to your gut
As parents and caregivers, we know in our gut if something is or isn’t right. If you feel in your gut that the provider not a right fit for your child, then make a change as quickly as you can. Don’t feel like you have to stay with the same provider if it’s not working.
What has your experience been finding childcare for your child with autism and ADHD? Do you have any tips to share? Leave a comment so we can encourage one another!
