Autism is a spectrum, which means individuals have a wide range of abilities. For some autistic students, school is a struggle every day just trying to write and understand the materials. For others, school is much easier, and they are very capable of getting As and Bs for grades. Social interactions and other dynamics affect how our kids view school, whether they are in kindergarten or high school. Yet, we want our children to be successful in school. So how can you motivate your child with autism and ADHD to strive for good grades and to do the best they can at school?
Why is school so challenging for children with autism and ADHD?
The school environment offers routine for autistic children, which is good. However, it brings a lot of challenges for children with autism and ADHD. Some of those include:
- Sensory issues – the lighting, noise, smells and other sensory elements of school can distract autistic children and teens from being able to concentrate on their teacher and schoolwork.
- Attention span – for our children who have ADHD, being able to focus and pay attention for long periods of time during the day is really difficult. Classrooms have a lot of items and activities that can easily pull your child’s attention away from the teacher’s instruction or the assignment they are working on in class. Our kids also may have a hard time sitting still for so long throughout day.
- Difficulty reading and writing – autistic students struggle with reading and writing for several reasons, including delays in fine motor skills. This can make school more challenging.
- Lack of executive function skills – for many of our kids with autism and ADHD, they lack executive function skills, which are essential for school success. These include task initiation, working memory, organizational skills, emotional control, planning and more.
- Social rules and communication – people with autism struggle with social cues, rules and interactions, and they also tend to lack effective communication skills. These are so important to enjoying school and interacting successfully with peers and teachers.
- Bullying – bullying or even intolerance of certain autistic behaviors is a big problem in schools. It can demotivate our children from striving to do well in their classes.
- Transitions – transitioning from one activity or class to another can be hard for children on the autism spectrum. If these transitions become part of the routine, then they are easier. However, not every day is the same at school, so new transitions for special events like field trips or a convocations can make school harder for our kids.
What is school refusal and how does it affect academic abilities
School refusal occurs when a child becomes highly distressed about going to school and feels like they cannot or won’t go. Studies have shown that school refusal occurs in children with autism significantly more often than their neurotypical peers.
Why do autistic children experience school refusal? Many of the reasons are noted above in the challenges listed. They want to avoid something that makes them uncomfortable at school, especially bullying. It also may occur because they simply want to stay at home.
What does school refusal look like? A child might hide when it’s time to go to school. They may beg and plead not to go, and they generally display high levels of anxiety about school. The child may claim they are too sick to go to school. They also can experience more meltdowns.
If children miss significantly more school or cannot cooperate and do their schoolwork, then it affects their ability to learn and do well academically. If they are not at school, it’s hard to be successful in learning and achieving good grades.
Want to find out how to overcome school refusal? Check out this article.
Why it’s important for autistic children to get good grades
As I noted above, children with autism are on a spectrum of capabilities. Therefore, there are many autistic children who will be able to complete post-secondary education – whether that is at a four-year university, community college or trade school. Getting good grades provides them with options for what they can do after high school.
This is something we have dealt with ourselves with our son J. J isn’t motivated by school and hasn’t had much interest in striving for good grades throughout his school years. Yet is he capable? If he works at it, he definitely is. Some subjects have come easier to him, and he’s gotten good grades in those subjects. For others like math, it’s a big struggle.
Now that he’s a teenager, I’ve been able to tie the need for good grades to his plans for after high school. Currently, he wants to pursue music therapy to join his desire to help others with his love of music. However, he needs to improve this grades so that he can get into the program. We know he will need to start at a community college to build his grades up as well as I think it will be an easier transition for him. Keeping him motivated for school though seems like a constant battle when he is also dealing with social situations that take over his focus on academics.
How can you motivate your child with autism to get good grades?
So how can we motivate our children to do their best in school and improve their grades? Here are some ways that I’ve found in my research on this subject to help motivate your child with autism and ADHD to strive for good grades.
1. Partner with your child’s or teen’s teacher(s) to ensure they feel welcomed and included in their classrooms.
Before school begins, see if you can meet with your child’s teacher(s) before the first day of school to discuss your child. If a meeting isn’t possible, then send them an email. Letting them know about your child’s strengths, challenges, interests and personality can go a long way in setting them up for success during the school year. Download the free Back-to-School checklist from my downloads library.
2. Find out more about your child’s teacher and classroom to see if they are setting your child up for success.
Studies have shown that students in general will learn best if they are in a classroom that has the following characteristics:
- Enthusiastic teacher
- Involvement of students actively during the instruction
- Appropriate level of materials being taught
- Lessons are well organized and easily understood by students
- Good rapport between the teacher and students
- Use of appropriate and concrete examples for lessons
- Relevance of the lessons
- Variety of teaching style and information
3. Set high but realistic expectations for your child or teen.
Communicating these expectations to your child’s teacher(s) is key. Teacher’s expectations of a child in the classroom can be key in the child striving to do the best they can. These expectations should be high enough to motivate your child but no so high that they are constantly frustrated and feel like they cannot meet them.
4. Encourage your child to set their own academic goals.
At the beginning of each school year (or even each semester), have them think about and write out two to three goals they would like to reach. It may be to finally achieve a B in math. The goal could be not to miss a homework assignment that semester. It could be reaching a certain minimum grade point average (GPA) that semester. Whatever it is, if they set the goal, then they will own it and may be more likely to work toward it.
5. Have your child or teen develop their own study plan.
Learning to study is a skill in itself. It’s something we’ve been working with our son J to do, not only to improve his grades in high school but to set him up for college as well. A few months ago, J created a study plan based on some research about ADHD and studying. Here is a generic version of that plan that you can download and use as a template for your own child or teen.
6. Praise your child for their efforts and when they do well.
It’s great to praise your child when they get a good grade and do well in school. But it’s even more powerful to praise the effort that went into achieving that grade. Praising the effort will encourage a growth mindset in your child and help them to understand that their own work will help them to be successful.
7. Tie incentives to your child’s special interest.
Using rewards and incentives can be a powerful aid to motivating your child or teen, especially because those with ADHD have a hard time motivating themselves internally. Yet, for children and teens with autism and ADHD, tying rewards and incentives to their special interests can be more motivating. For example, once your child completes their homework, they can do something extra related to their special interest. For example, maybe it’s 15 more minutes of video games than they normally have.
8. Be active in your child’s schooling.
We want our children and teens to take responsibility and know their required assignments, upcoming tests and class projects. However, our kids with autism and ADHD may need a bit more help from us as parents. If your child’s school uses an online classroom system like Canvas or Blackboard, be sure to obtain a parent observation account. Regularly check your child’s dashboard and also their school’s grading system (many schools use PowerSchool) to keep on top of your child’s grades and assignments. This will help you with the knowledge to know what type of questions to ask your child or teen. At our house, I try to do weekly check-in meetings for school for both of my boys on Sundays. I don’t always remember, but I try. We check their grades in PowerSchool and check Canvas for upcoming tests, projects, etc.
Need More Resources?
Check out these resources that provide more information to help motivate your child or teen with autism and/or ADHD to strive for good grades.
School Success for Kids With High-Functioning Autism (affiliate link)
Middle School Matters: The 10 Key Skills Kids Need to Thrive in Middle School and Beyond–and How Parents Can Help (affiliate link)
Social Skills Picture Book for High School and Beyond (affiliate link)
What other steps have you taken to motivate your child with autism and ADHD to strive for good grades and do their best in school? Leave a comment so that we can share and encourage one another on this journey!
